I sit alone
on this stiff chair
hands folded
going by the rules
I stare at the window
a small oblong gift
of dirt streaked light
beams into my lap
I hear your steps
thick rubber ones
that walk behind
a crippled cart you push
I wonder for another day
why I am here
I am not dying
I am not even sick
Yet you fill me with pills
and look at my pale wrists
hacked with rusty hidden blades
a feeble cry for help, not death
You do not understand me
you look at words on a
stranger’s chart and don’t listen
to words cried from my heart
I just need to be loved
I cry aloud with my pain
and you give me another pill
so that I sleep till love comes
I will not find love here
anymore than I found help
I must leave this dim sunshine room
and go seeking in brightness
I will leave a piece of myself
a gentle sadness and despair
that lingers in the shadows
a permanent patient
So that you never forget
that once there was a
fragile, dark haired girl
who you left alone too often
in the sunshine room.
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Copyright ©2000 by Sylvia Spivey. All rights reserved.
First Place, Webstatic Poetry Contest, Second Half 2000
Sylvia’s biography page
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